I knew the D.C. medical examiner at the time of the Air Florida crash and I believe the trauma of that event encouraged him to retire early. I had a near miss landing at Reagan in 1972 on a small twin-beech aircraft with 4 of us passengers and two pilots when the tower told us to "pull up, pull up and go around" as a large 737 AA came within feet on our left as we were both on final approach. Back in the day we often flew with the cockpit door open so we could hear the communication between pilots on other planes and from the ground as well. After we landed I heard "Penn Stater (the commuter airline) This is American 4783, thank you" I flew hundreds of thousands of miles commercially over 60 years and had some other events requiring immediate correction to avoid some kind of unfortunate ending. Do I think about the odds? Not really. I continue to live without fear. My thoughts are with the families who have lost loved ones and how we might take a lesson in transcending our differences as witnessed by athletes, astronauts, scientists, researchers, humanitarians and students. That they are from different countries does not matter. What matters is how we can cooperate, collaborate and work together for a healthy, safe and peaceful world. Imagine if the two top leaders of the U.S. and Russia could step out of their egotistical need for power and control and learn how to skate together and have a relationship that could help solve some of the big issues on the planet.
Gary, your thoughtful writing here (and also on your stack!) resonates strongly, albeit gracefully, for me. Your simple question: Do I think about the odds? Your answer: Not really—is a perspective changer.
Thanks for sharing Debbie. I did feel similarly after hearing this news. I’ve retired/next chapter a bit earlier than expected (61) for some of these very reasons - being grateful and wishing to experience this all too brief life before it’s gone.
I cannot think about the odds with air travel, or the near misses that I (landing once on a sequestered runway lined with foam and emergency vehicles in Copenhagen 🫨) or my loved ones (brother left for a conference a day early and thus was not on one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center 😱) have had. If we didn’t fly, we’d never see each other.
The unpredictability of life and its end— my mother died far too soon, suddenly at 74 from pancreatic cancer— has made me determined to live as much as possible and not put off anything important. I turn 60 this year and am not waiting to turn 65 (retirement) for the next phase of my life
Oops, I’ll finish that thought. Like I say, I love flying, and I don’t think about the statistics or probabilities.
As for the privilege of growing old, I would absolutely love to live another 50 years, which would make me very old. And I am grateful for the privilege of growing older regularly. I remember when my age, 48, seemed old. It is only one of the very many perspectives. I love having witnessed change in and change me. I can only imagine there will be much more of that to come, that I will look back on things I thought and believed at this age and think how naïve and young I was.
Beautiful post, Debbie. thanks for the great questions.
Wow. So many thoughts brimming up around this horrific event and week. I lost my mom when I was 9. She was 39. I am now 47, and my bro and I briefly about her death and how much longer we have lived than her just Wed (before I learned about this). There was a time after her death I never thought I would live past 18. Now I have mixed feelings about aging and death. I am loving growing wiser and more bold. I have 2 years before my youngest is off to college and I have more freedom to be more nomadic and free. Yet, and I know I am younger than most on here, having no real family of my own…and no corporate job with benefits and stuff and the current state of politics world over…honestly sometimes I am like…okay just take me quick. But if not, I am feeling that generationality pull to do as much as I can to help wake people up and try to get us out of patriarchy as I can before I leave. So naw…I am thankful most days I am still here and able to make a slight difference. And I have been fortunate after leaving the christian church to learn other spiritual ideas about the cycle of life. Think I need to do a post on it. Because rewriting or resurrecting better stories for our collective consciousness right now is so vital. Thanks for the idea!!
Soooo..I started this post and realized i couldn't just write one about this topic. I was at one point during Covid going to write a non-fiction book talking about the Power of Death to Create Life...because I have learned that how a society thinks and tells the story about death and after...is how they live. But then I realized people might learn more from a fiction book -- so that is where I am now. In the first of a 3 book series -- with another 3 book series (and both with prequels) that will be doing my darndest to help show people what it means to apply the work of Deconstructing Patriarchy to our creation and death myths. Anywho -- for now -- here is 1 of at least 3 on this topic. Hopefully if the politics of today do not over take my work, post 2 and 3 will follow this and next week. I hope it helps in some small or big way :-0 <3
Lost my best friend at the age of 27 to cervical cancer (repeatedly mis-diagnosed as thrush), so I have never taken getting older for granted. Every time crappy things happen, or I'm grumbling about wrinkles/greying hair/jowls/whatever, I remember that Karen would have given anything for the privilege of being able to grouse about the inconveniences of getting older. My heart goes out to those who lost their lives in this horrific crash, and their families. Every day we get to spend on this beautiful planet of ours, with people we love, is such a blessing.
Yes age does have a way with our perspective. Many times I am thankful to be alive- but its not tragedy that evokes it. I think more basic- the first snowdroprs, an infant chuckle, finding the last of the choc chip bag hidden in the pantry, when I have that chocolat craving. Tragedy is the accompaniement of life that is lived, the yin versus the yang.
I remember that flight that hit the bridge, thought of it last time I was in DC just a few years ago. Try not to use that airport any more (my family lived near DC in Maryland for a while). Every day I wake up I’m thankful to be this old (have recently turned 72), already having outlived my natural parents. I am also praying for the skating community as one of my poet friends out here in Vancouver is related to people prominent in Boston Skating Club, who
lost their upcoming stars this week. We never know when it will be our turn. Thankful also that my young ones are still alive in spite of the challenges of their generation, as noted by previous commenter. Hoping that we can learn to work together to make things better rather than worse.
I just was texting my sister who was hoping to go to Washington this spring to see the cherry blossoms but now is too anxious to fly. I do understand this sadly. I am reluctant now too and my other sister lives in Virginia. Here in Canada we see the news of what is happening down in the states and are appalled. So much is incomprehensible
For me - immersed in trying to support people living unhoused in our beautiful, prosperous but often stunningly heartless (IMO) city that is located in a province going into its NINTH year of a public health emergency due to the toxic drug crisis (https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/eight-years-bc-toxic-drug-crisis-1.7173592) it doesn't take a big disaster to bring me to considering the privilege it is to grow old. A slow motion disaster is unfolding around me every day in this picturesque city. In a province of about 5 million people 6 people lose their lives every day. As our city continues to criminalize and stigmatize homelessness and drug use folks retreat further and further away from each other and what little support exists which of course only increases the likelihood they will die.
Last year a young student at the University where I work lost her life due to 'drug poisoning' (there's lots of debate about what to call these deaths - it seems inaccurate to call them overdoses when if the drugs were 'pure' the person would likely still be alive - https://vancouver.citynews.ca/2024/05/16/university-victoria-student-toxic-drug-death-coroner-investigation/). Perhaps that event will change the conversation as she is clearly not one of 'those people'. In fact most of these deaths occur in people using in private homes - not on the street or in homeless encampments but as we've learned people don't want to accept facts that don't align with their world view.
I remember that crash in ‘82. Especially the video of a bystander diving into the freezing water to help a shocked passenger grab onto the flotation device.
I have different reminders of my blessings. I know that flying is safer than driving and that you are more likely to be struck by lightening twice than be in a plane crash. I feel grateful whenever I arrive to my destination via car. 🚗🙏
What happened was so tragic, but I hear you -- here's to growing older. And, by the grace of God, I'll have a few more years added to my tally before I leave this earth.
I remember that day well (the Air Florida crash), there was also Metro crash that day. My family probably pays more attention than most to aviation disasters, as my father did aviation disaster litigation, one of my sisters is a retired commercial pilot, and Jim has a pilot’s license.
You always hear of the person who didn’t board an ill-fated flight. This time I actually know that person, and she is not old. She takes that flight pretty regularly. She was in line for security for that flight when a constellation of things occurred that made her change her plan and go to Atlanta. The thought that she could be gone in a flash, while we sit here reading our newspapers, is sobering.
As you know, I live in London, but that crash has been headline news here since it happened. I think people everywhere have a similar reaction. Oh my God, what if I had been on that plane (or my husband, my child etc.)? Yes, I am about to be 83 and still in good health and living a good life. We all need to be grateful but we do forget, so you were very right to post this piece.
These tragedies do give one pause especially for me as an aviation professional. I've spent many hours in the sky, and I am familiar with the thrill of flight as well as the fear of something going wrong. I too have succeeded in growing old, and there have been times when my life could have been cut short. That alone pushes me to strive every day to be present and enjoy life no matter what is thrown my way.
For me, Debbie, growing old is better than the alternative. I have add many times when a few seconds made the difference between life and death. Excellent article.
![[B]OLD AGE with Debbie Weil](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!i8Z0!,w_80,h_80,c_fill,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep,g_auto/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fdaaca764-d8d6-4a1b-bf58-61dbb72810fc_842x842.png)
![[B]OLD AGE with Debbie Weil](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!i8Z0!,w_36,h_36,c_fill,f_webp,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep,g_auto/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fdaaca764-d8d6-4a1b-bf58-61dbb72810fc_842x842.png)
![[B]OLD AGE with Debbie Weil](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!fEcd!,e_trim:10:white/e_trim:10:transparent/h_72,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F95ad4442-e435-4ebc-a8d2-9c9b89a8bdb6_2100x400.png)
I knew the D.C. medical examiner at the time of the Air Florida crash and I believe the trauma of that event encouraged him to retire early. I had a near miss landing at Reagan in 1972 on a small twin-beech aircraft with 4 of us passengers and two pilots when the tower told us to "pull up, pull up and go around" as a large 737 AA came within feet on our left as we were both on final approach. Back in the day we often flew with the cockpit door open so we could hear the communication between pilots on other planes and from the ground as well. After we landed I heard "Penn Stater (the commuter airline) This is American 4783, thank you" I flew hundreds of thousands of miles commercially over 60 years and had some other events requiring immediate correction to avoid some kind of unfortunate ending. Do I think about the odds? Not really. I continue to live without fear. My thoughts are with the families who have lost loved ones and how we might take a lesson in transcending our differences as witnessed by athletes, astronauts, scientists, researchers, humanitarians and students. That they are from different countries does not matter. What matters is how we can cooperate, collaborate and work together for a healthy, safe and peaceful world. Imagine if the two top leaders of the U.S. and Russia could step out of their egotistical need for power and control and learn how to skate together and have a relationship that could help solve some of the big issues on the planet.
Gary, your thoughtful writing here (and also on your stack!) resonates strongly, albeit gracefully, for me. Your simple question: Do I think about the odds? Your answer: Not really—is a perspective changer.
Thanks, Debbie.
I love this exchange between you two
And I love you and your response! Happy Monday, my friend.
🥰
Well said. Thank you for this important perspective, Gary.
Thanks for sharing Debbie. I did feel similarly after hearing this news. I’ve retired/next chapter a bit earlier than expected (61) for some of these very reasons - being grateful and wishing to experience this all too brief life before it’s gone.
Cheers
I cannot think about the odds with air travel, or the near misses that I (landing once on a sequestered runway lined with foam and emergency vehicles in Copenhagen 🫨) or my loved ones (brother left for a conference a day early and thus was not on one of the planes that crashed into the World Trade Center 😱) have had. If we didn’t fly, we’d never see each other.
The unpredictability of life and its end— my mother died far too soon, suddenly at 74 from pancreatic cancer— has made me determined to live as much as possible and not put off anything important. I turn 60 this year and am not waiting to turn 65 (retirement) for the next phase of my life
Oops, I’ll finish that thought. Like I say, I love flying, and I don’t think about the statistics or probabilities.
As for the privilege of growing old, I would absolutely love to live another 50 years, which would make me very old. And I am grateful for the privilege of growing older regularly. I remember when my age, 48, seemed old. It is only one of the very many perspectives. I love having witnessed change in and change me. I can only imagine there will be much more of that to come, that I will look back on things I thought and believed at this age and think how naïve and young I was.
Beautiful post, Debbie. thanks for the great questions.
Wow. So many thoughts brimming up around this horrific event and week. I lost my mom when I was 9. She was 39. I am now 47, and my bro and I briefly about her death and how much longer we have lived than her just Wed (before I learned about this). There was a time after her death I never thought I would live past 18. Now I have mixed feelings about aging and death. I am loving growing wiser and more bold. I have 2 years before my youngest is off to college and I have more freedom to be more nomadic and free. Yet, and I know I am younger than most on here, having no real family of my own…and no corporate job with benefits and stuff and the current state of politics world over…honestly sometimes I am like…okay just take me quick. But if not, I am feeling that generationality pull to do as much as I can to help wake people up and try to get us out of patriarchy as I can before I leave. So naw…I am thankful most days I am still here and able to make a slight difference. And I have been fortunate after leaving the christian church to learn other spiritual ideas about the cycle of life. Think I need to do a post on it. Because rewriting or resurrecting better stories for our collective consciousness right now is so vital. Thanks for the idea!!
Holli, I want to hear more; write that post!
Soooo..I started this post and realized i couldn't just write one about this topic. I was at one point during Covid going to write a non-fiction book talking about the Power of Death to Create Life...because I have learned that how a society thinks and tells the story about death and after...is how they live. But then I realized people might learn more from a fiction book -- so that is where I am now. In the first of a 3 book series -- with another 3 book series (and both with prequels) that will be doing my darndest to help show people what it means to apply the work of Deconstructing Patriarchy to our creation and death myths. Anywho -- for now -- here is 1 of at least 3 on this topic. Hopefully if the politics of today do not over take my work, post 2 and 3 will follow this and next week. I hope it helps in some small or big way :-0 <3
https://hollimcormick.substack.com/p/from-fear-to-the-pregnant-void-my
Definitely will. Probably 2 weeks from now 🥰
Lost my best friend at the age of 27 to cervical cancer (repeatedly mis-diagnosed as thrush), so I have never taken getting older for granted. Every time crappy things happen, or I'm grumbling about wrinkles/greying hair/jowls/whatever, I remember that Karen would have given anything for the privilege of being able to grouse about the inconveniences of getting older. My heart goes out to those who lost their lives in this horrific crash, and their families. Every day we get to spend on this beautiful planet of ours, with people we love, is such a blessing.
Yes age does have a way with our perspective. Many times I am thankful to be alive- but its not tragedy that evokes it. I think more basic- the first snowdroprs, an infant chuckle, finding the last of the choc chip bag hidden in the pantry, when I have that chocolat craving. Tragedy is the accompaniement of life that is lived, the yin versus the yang.
Meredith, ha ha I have the same strategy for the bag of chocolate chips; hide it and hope I forget about it myself
I remember that flight that hit the bridge, thought of it last time I was in DC just a few years ago. Try not to use that airport any more (my family lived near DC in Maryland for a while). Every day I wake up I’m thankful to be this old (have recently turned 72), already having outlived my natural parents. I am also praying for the skating community as one of my poet friends out here in Vancouver is related to people prominent in Boston Skating Club, who
lost their upcoming stars this week. We never know when it will be our turn. Thankful also that my young ones are still alive in spite of the challenges of their generation, as noted by previous commenter. Hoping that we can learn to work together to make things better rather than worse.
I just was texting my sister who was hoping to go to Washington this spring to see the cherry blossoms but now is too anxious to fly. I do understand this sadly. I am reluctant now too and my other sister lives in Virginia. Here in Canada we see the news of what is happening down in the states and are appalled. So much is incomprehensible
For me - immersed in trying to support people living unhoused in our beautiful, prosperous but often stunningly heartless (IMO) city that is located in a province going into its NINTH year of a public health emergency due to the toxic drug crisis (https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/eight-years-bc-toxic-drug-crisis-1.7173592) it doesn't take a big disaster to bring me to considering the privilege it is to grow old. A slow motion disaster is unfolding around me every day in this picturesque city. In a province of about 5 million people 6 people lose their lives every day. As our city continues to criminalize and stigmatize homelessness and drug use folks retreat further and further away from each other and what little support exists which of course only increases the likelihood they will die.
Last year a young student at the University where I work lost her life due to 'drug poisoning' (there's lots of debate about what to call these deaths - it seems inaccurate to call them overdoses when if the drugs were 'pure' the person would likely still be alive - https://vancouver.citynews.ca/2024/05/16/university-victoria-student-toxic-drug-death-coroner-investigation/). Perhaps that event will change the conversation as she is clearly not one of 'those people'. In fact most of these deaths occur in people using in private homes - not on the street or in homeless encampments but as we've learned people don't want to accept facts that don't align with their world view.
I remember that crash in ‘82. Especially the video of a bystander diving into the freezing water to help a shocked passenger grab onto the flotation device.
I have different reminders of my blessings. I know that flying is safer than driving and that you are more likely to be struck by lightening twice than be in a plane crash. I feel grateful whenever I arrive to my destination via car. 🚗🙏
What happened was so tragic, but I hear you -- here's to growing older. And, by the grace of God, I'll have a few more years added to my tally before I leave this earth.
I remember that day well (the Air Florida crash), there was also Metro crash that day. My family probably pays more attention than most to aviation disasters, as my father did aviation disaster litigation, one of my sisters is a retired commercial pilot, and Jim has a pilot’s license.
You always hear of the person who didn’t board an ill-fated flight. This time I actually know that person, and she is not old. She takes that flight pretty regularly. She was in line for security for that flight when a constellation of things occurred that made her change her plan and go to Atlanta. The thought that she could be gone in a flash, while we sit here reading our newspapers, is sobering.
Nancy, so chilling; an even louder wake-up call to the sometimes cruel randomness of our lives, despite our best efforts to control things.
As you know, I live in London, but that crash has been headline news here since it happened. I think people everywhere have a similar reaction. Oh my God, what if I had been on that plane (or my husband, my child etc.)? Yes, I am about to be 83 and still in good health and living a good life. We all need to be grateful but we do forget, so you were very right to post this piece.
These tragedies do give one pause especially for me as an aviation professional. I've spent many hours in the sky, and I am familiar with the thrill of flight as well as the fear of something going wrong. I too have succeeded in growing old, and there have been times when my life could have been cut short. That alone pushes me to strive every day to be present and enjoy life no matter what is thrown my way.
For me, Debbie, growing old is better than the alternative. I have add many times when a few seconds made the difference between life and death. Excellent article.